The older my kids get the more I see myself in them. While I would like to say it’s in their smile or the similarities in our facial expressions, that trigger the “wow they’re mine” moments; it’s typically the challenging moments that make me go “oh crap, there I am!” (Insert face palm)
My kid sassed back (yup, I was a sassy one), my other kid is climbing the window sill (guilty, I was an active climber too), the kids are picky eaters (ugh, my mom did those battles with me too).
There are many little things, but the more I raise my kids, the more I’m reminded just how much I have been trained, molded and prepared for this mission of motherhood.
While yes, I have a few flaws and traits or two that I wouldn’t like my kids to inherit, (especially my impatience and perfectionism) I also have been given a certain set of strengths and gifts that are specific qualities and capabilities to raise them.
I was reminded recently of Gods call on my life to raise these three boys; He reminded me that he “entrusted me” with them. He trusts me to be their mother; to raise them well.
Not the kid down the street, (I don’t have the skill set for that kid!) but he entrusted ME with MY kids.
There are no mismatched mistakes; my kids are my kids for a reason.
I know my experience working in a school prepared me to home school my kids. I know that class I took on behaviour management helps me to discipline my kids; I know that lesson I learned and still learning on taking deep breaths in my impatience, is helping my son with his impatience.
I’m three months deep into having three boys and the deeper I get into raising these young men the more I realize how I was totally meant to be a boy mom. I love dirty summer feet, don’t mind the dirty faces and sticky fingers, the loudness all the time, the rough and tumble. Why? I had two brothers! I’m used to boys and even in that I was prepared for my boys!
These three little boys were placed in my womb, raised under my roof and put in my care?
God trusts me with it all...
The other day, my eldest was having a meltdown and I quickly started to feel defeated. It was one of those moments where I just needed a mom break, hide in the bathroom and call it a day. We all have days like that am I right?!
But something in my mind shifted when I proclaimed the words “God entrusted me with you,” over my son. In this moment, in my son’s meltdown, I am the one called to comfort, train and encourage my boy.
Even in the hard moments when I want to tap out, hideaway in the bathroom, I need to get back up and say “I’m here,” because God has entrusted me with the good, the bad and the ugly moments.
It’s in the hard moments of motherhood that he has called me to show patience and love, acceptance and forgiveness. In the sad moments, he has called me to kiss their sweet faces, hold them in my arms and encourage them that things will be better. In the happy moments, he has called me to enjoy them, smile and laugh with them.
These moments were all for me, for us; together.
It’s in these moments that God entrusted me to raise these young boys into men; my calling, my life, my purpose.
Motherhood; I was made for this mission, build for this mission, called for this mission, prepared for this mission; this is my mission.
He entrusted me; for Noah, Isaac and Zachary.
Wife. Mama. Doula. Writer. Blogger. Singer. Christian.